Texts Archive
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You Wanna Play The Rape Game?
Posted on June 16, 2012You wanna play the rape game? – No – That’s the spirit. -
Being Nice To People Is Just Like Smoking
Posted on June 16, 2012Being nice to people is just like smoking! – It’s best to never start -
It’s Ok If You Disagree With Me…
Posted on June 16, 2012It’s ok if you disagree with me – I can’t force you to be right -
On A Scale Of North Korea To America
Posted on June 16, 2012On a scale of north korea to america… how free are you tonight? Canada more funny texts here -
I’m Making Some Changes In My Life…
Posted on June 15, 2012I’m making some changes in my life. if you don’t hear anything from me you are one of them. -
I Love You With All My Boobs
Posted on June 12, 2012I love you with all my boobs. I would say heart, but my boobs are bigger. -
I Need To Talk To You
Posted on June 11, 2012I need to talk to you. – That one sentence that has the power to make you remember every single bad thing you did in your whole life. -
Sex Is A Sensation Caused By Temptation
Posted on June 9, 2012Sex is a sensation caused by temptation -
It’s Friday I’m Getting Pregnant Tonight!
Posted on June 8, 2012Whoo hoo! It’s friday. Screw the gym! I’m getting pregnant tonight! -
My Ex Had One Very Annoying Habit
Posted on June 7, 2012My EX had one very annoying habit… breathing. via spousegotthehouse.com -
On The Internet You Can Be Anything You Want
Posted on June 6, 2012On the internet you can be anything you want. It’s strange that so many people choose to be stupid. -
Does Anger Management Really Work?
Posted on June 5, 2012Does anger management really work? It’s a long read but its worth it – from yahoo answers -
I Will Always Choose A Lazy Person To Do A Difficult Job
Posted on June 5, 2012Bill Gates Says: I will always choose a lazy person to do a difficult job… because, he will find an easy way to do it. quote -
I Shook My Cock Too Hard
Posted on June 4, 2012I shook my cock too hard – Holy crap I mean coke. -
I’ve Had The Time Of My Life Text
Posted on June 4, 2012I’ve had the time of my life – dirty bit – text -
I Also Know That Feel Bro
Posted on May 31, 2012Hey Sophie! I think she gave you the wrong number – I know that feel bro – text -
You Cannot Beat A Woman In An Argument
Posted on May 30, 2012Wise words from Chris Rock – Don’t Argue! You cannot beat a woman in an argument. -
Siri Tell Me A Joke About Chris Brown And Rihanna
Posted on May 30, 2012Siri Tell me a joke about Chris Brown and Rihanna – I can’t. I always forget the punch line. -
Another Classic Text From Dog
Posted on May 29, 2012Had a fight with a gang of squirrels – Text from Dog – via textsfromdog.tumblr.com -
Every Phone Should Have This Feature
Posted on May 28, 2012Drunk Mode every phone should have this feature… -
You’re Grounded And You Know It
Posted on May 28, 2012Coolest mom text ever… You’re grounded and you know it. -
Even Your Bling Says Your 15 Minutes Have Passed
Posted on May 28, 2012Burn… @chrisbrown even your bling says your 15 minutes have passed -
How Much Does A Hipster Weigh?
Posted on May 25, 2012How much does a hipster weight? An instagram. -
Friends Are Like Boobs
Posted on May 22, 2012Friends are like Boobs. Some are big. Some are small. Some are real. Some are fake. -
Dude Why Is There A Crack On My Phone
Posted on May 22, 2012Dude why is there a crack on my phone? more funny texts here