11 Crazy Thoughts That Seem Perfectly Logical When You’re Jacked Up On Adderall

1. “I’m going to alphabetize all my books and movies. Wait, now I’m going to sort them by color. What if I organize them by the date the author’s parents were born???” 

2. “NO ONE IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD HAS EVER TYPED A TEXT MESSAGE AS FAST AS I’M TYPING RIGHT NOW!”

3. “Is it weird that I’m doing the most mundane, boring task but it’s quite possibly the most enjoyable thing I’ve ever done in my life?”

4. “Ok let me just write 300 more pages on why “Honey, I Shrunk the Kids” could actually happen and then I’ll take a bathroom break, I swear.”

5. “What? Hungry? Haha why would I be hungry? I ate on Thursday. Wait, today’s Tuesday? How did I forget to eat for 5 days? That was TWO Tuesdays ago???”

6. “I should call Kevin. He’s probably not awake, but I just had the best idea! WE SHOULD START A PODCAST! Oh, and we should open a sandwich shop! And get our MBAs!”

7. “I am the Michael Jordan of whatever it is I’m doing right now. Literally the best in the world. I’M ON FIRE!”

8. “If I lie down in bed now and can fall asleep in the next 45 minutes that means I can sleep two hours before I have to be in class and then I can close my eyes for 13 minutes if I run straight from that class to my next one. But what if I can cut down the time it actually takes me to get to the first class? I’d better get a pen and paper and work out the math on this for the next hour.”

9. “Seriously, how great is EDM?????? Every track is just perfect! Also, Rock, Rap, Classical, New Wave, Ska, ALL MUSIC IS AWESOME AND I LOVE IT ALL. Maybe I’ll become a musician. I’m totally going to learn guitar, piano and drums right now.”

10. “If I’m this good at Call of Duty right now, I could basically be Bradley Cooper in American Sniper. Where do I sign up to do that? Ooh, what if I made an app where you could sign up for the military? And an app that let’s me see when my friends are within 2 miles of my house. And and app that’s Seamless, but JUST for pizza.”

11. “Aaaaaand it finally wore off.”

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